Saturday, April 14, 2007

RSVP, damn it!

I have to get this off my chest. People, it is rude as hell to not respond to an invitation. It is worse to respond and not follow through on your response.

Allow me to explain. When someone decides to host an event, be it a party, poker tournament, or whatever, they are doing two things. First, they are offering to go to trouble and expense for your benefit. They are also paying you the compliment of wanting your company. In many cases, they are also taking a risk that they will be able to create a fun, entertaining event for all of the guests. When you don't reply to an invitation, or say you are coming and don't come, or say you are not coming and then show up, you are undermining the host's ability to provided the event for others and ignoring a compliment (i.e. being a jerk).

A case in point was last nights poker game. One player drove for 45 minutes with a limited budget to play in the tournament. He had been assured that we had enough players coming. When two people did not show up, we didn't have enough. We switched to a cash game. The long-driving player really didn't have enough money to play effectively and was broke after about 30 minutes. An hour and a half of driving for 30 minutes of short-handed poker is not fair to him and is an embarassment to the host (not me).

A short phone call by the no-shows might have avoided this whole mess. It is a simple consideration that I've seen avoided time and time again until I'm sick of it.

I know that stuff comes up at the last minute. Kids get sick, spouses decide that you can't leave, cars break, we forget about previous engagement until the last minute. That kind of stuff happens and is understandable. But you can almost always call when it does.

In summary, the invitation is a compliment that says that someone would like your company. Don't be a jerk. Treat it as such and respond. Then follow through. Rant complete.

2 comments:

tcsparky said...

I agree....yeah- what he said.

mk99 said...

Ditto. Amen brother. You go guy.

I as a host spend countless hours and waking nights planning the perfect party so that everyone has a great time. More time than probably called for. It is very discouraging when folks don't bother to show who have assured me they would be there. Some call, some don't.

You make a great point. It is a compliment and I need to start acting more like it is a coo to be invited instead of the other way around.